left out
hi im a 19 year old guy.. i often am left out on stuff like my friends wil go out n stuff n wil not really bother to cal me up or nethin.. i dont have a big group or i dun knw many people but i hv thes 4-5 'friends'.. i wanna knw if this is normal or its jst happens wid me.. i mean ders nuthin wrong wid me but now i wonder mayb ther is thts the reason y i am mostly left out.. will this continue like that? or its jst the age that i am in at the moment wher all this is normal.. sumtimes my friends make their plans n everythin n its lik wen i cal them up they r already out partyin or jst hangin out n that realy hurts me.. its like why dint they cal me up? wen wil i have a good set of friends? i feel that maybe wen i get a little older i will have those close friends that im lookin for as now no one is that matured! dont get me wrong i do go out wid them but most of the times im left out n tht realy hurts me cuz i consider them as my friend.. just today my friend (neighbour) went out n wen i called him up he was alraedy out n was lik ill giv u a cal if nethin fun cums up..its not that he went out wid sumone i dun knw, who he went to meet was of the same 4 to 5 friends tht i mentioned of
pls tel me if this is normal or its jst wid me or it happens wid everyone at this age as no one is so matured n ill find good friends wen i get a little older??
pls help
sounds like your friends do a lot of fun things together. Tell me if I'm wrong but it seems like you might be the type to go to the party and kind of be quiet and not talk to anyone, therefore coming off as boring. If that is the case, then you need to get out there and be the life of the party, or at least a confident guy talking to girls and guys alike, show your friends that you can be a fun guy to be around. Hell, at the parties, if you need to then have some drinks, that will bring the inner confidence out
i agree with junk, you need to drink more than you do. a lot more. start doing that and everything will be fine.
The first thing you should do is tell your mates that it annoys you, just make sure it's not in a whiny 'Why don't you pay me enough attention?' way or they're going to want to hang around with you less. It could be they don't even register that they're leaving you out, or think you don't care, I know personally I don't ask all my mates when I go out but if I knew someone was sitting at home bored or felt as though they were being left out I would make sure I invited them.
I would recommend joining a couple of clubs or societies, especially if you're in Uni/college (though there's clubs outside that environment too) since this will give you a chance to meet new people and have some fun with them, especially societies where you don't know anybody as it'll encourage you to socialise and move beyond your comfort zone, and also if you don't talk to anybody or even embarrass yourself it won't matter as much. And, as an added benefit if you start hanging around with other people the friends you've got now might start to appreciate you a little more, they seem to take for granted that you'll hang out with them whenever they ask, if they have to compete for your time a little more they could well end up a lot more welcoming to you (I've seen it happen before to people on the periphery of groups who began to drift away a little, the original group of friends ended up including them a lot more because they didn't want them gone completely).
lotsofjunk and p00ltoy make a good point about the alcohol, it does help you loosen up, but be careful not to overdo it especially if you're a lightweight, you could either end up acting like a total dick or vomiting all over the place, neither of which are going to be particularly endearing. Good luck anyway ^_^
What's the point in getting drunk?
And telling someone they should drink to help them, well that is completely bullshit advice.
If that's the advice you'd give every person you know, than it must be really clear why you all come on this fucked up site.
no, the advice was to drink a little to bring out some confidence, that's not bad advice at all. Bad drinking advice would be telling them to get totally plastered
no, the advice was to drink a little to bring out some confidence, that's not bad advice at all. Bad drinking advice would be telling them to get totally plastered
-lotsofjunk
yes. all drugs (and alcohol is a drug) are also medicines. used correctly, they can help people.
yes. all drugs (and alcohol is a drug) are also medicines. used correctly, they can help people.-p00ltoy
well technically every substance like that is a drug, but alcohol is not a synthetic drug and more of a poison
