Is he a keeper?

Well what you have to do p00ltoy is talk with your boyfriend, have a deep conversation. Try smoking pot with him it will really help with your relationship make you guys closer. Try talking to him about serious issues like the depression and the suicidal thoughts.

Well I hope this helps you p00ltoy.

LOL ahahahahahaha!

I have talked to him about it and he just blows me off. And im not smoking pot with him. Id never touch weed. Ever. When I bring up his depression, he just gets pissy and ignores me and just says that im all up in his case.
Whatever this sucks.

And "Lotsofjunk"

What the hell is so funny? Grow up.

And "Lotsofjunk"
What the hell is so funny? Grow up.

-bluestar789

nice touch junkster. criticize yourself so that no one suspects you're bluestar. im always underestimating you. :D

I have talked to him about it and he just blows me off. And im not smoking pot with him. Id never touch weed. Ever. When I bring up his depression, he just gets pissy and ignores me and just says that im all up in his case.Whatever this sucks.
And "Lotsofjunk"
What the hell is so funny? Grow up.

-bluestar789

you're a fucking moron, I was laughing at what cody said because it's probably true

nice touch junkster. criticize yourself so that no one suspects you're bluestar. im always underestimating you. :D

-p00ltoy

same goes for you, you old geezer

Alright, so ive been with my boyfriend for over a year now. I love him more than anything, but im starting to have an issue. See, he smokes pot all the time. Actually, he smokes so much that he forgets to call me at night time, or text me. Maybe im just being annoying, but he always says he'll do something but never goes through with it. He chooses pot over me even talking to me. Ill be so nice and ask him how his day is, and he'll get all b**chy and say that hes going to go smoke so he doesnt have time to talk to me. He has no f**king money because thats what he spends it on. Hes in college, but he doesn't even want to be in college for his profession anymore. He doesnt know what he wants to do with life. Hes extremely depressed and suicidal alot. Im with him because I love him for the amazing parts of his personality, but hes always telling me that hes going to die young. And that hurts me so much to hear that the guy I love is saying that he hopes hes going to get hit by a bus someday. Like why the f**k would you tell your girlfriend that? Hes on depression pills, so im hoping to god that they work. His birth father is crazy and in an asylum so my boyfriend always assumes that he'll end up crazy because of genetics. He doesn't even know for sure. He wont be honest with his psyciatrist because he doesnt trust him. He doesnt trust his doctor because one time when he was suicidal, his doctor put him in the hospital, so he hates his doctor now. Hes on probation and hes not even allowed to talk to anybody under 18. He is 18, im almost 16. I love him so much and im so worried for him, but its so stressful because hes such a pot head, hes completely depressed and he has no intrest in ANYTHING. He doesnt even smile or laugh anymore. =[ Im hoping this gets better. I treat him so well and try to be there for him, so I know im a good girlfriend. Am i doing a bad thing by staying positive and trying to help him? He says that if im not with him, he'll kill himself. And I dont want to leave him, I just want this to get fixed. Your thoughts? sorry that this was so long... its just a complicated story. What do you guys think?

-bluestar789

ok, clearly your boyfriend is an idiot. but because he is an idiot he needs you, so try not to give up on him. You say you love him a lot so I'm sure you won't, best of luck to you

Uhm, What?

He isn't "bluestar", I am, clearly. Im confused about what you said, but whatever.

And I came here for advice to see what people think about this. I believe im being a good person my  helping somebody who is depressed. Well, im trying to be there for him. He knows that only he can help himself, but he doesnt do a damn thing about it. I just hope the depression pills that hes on work eventually. =[

Well it seems he's not motivated to keep the relationship in a constant motion.

By the sounds of it - he's clearly not using pot for "recreation" purposes but to use it to escape something in his life.

Maybe if you look deeper and see what could be affecting him - is college stressful for him? Have you asked him about his thoughts on the relationship? 

same goes for you, you old geezer

-lotsofjunk

thank you man!

Uhm, What?
He isn't "bluestar", I am, clearly. Im confused about what you said, but whatever.

And I came here for advice to see what people think about this. I believe im being a good person my  helping somebody who is depressed. Well, im trying to be there for him. He knows that only he can help himself, but he doesnt do a damn thing about it. I just hope the depression pills that hes on work eventually. =[

-bluestar789

yes. very often, in fact most of the time, people who are depressed do not help themselves. in fact, they sabotage themselves and will reject any solution offered to them. thats part of being depressed and why it is so hard to get out of it. just be there for him and dont make him feel like a loser because he doesn't seem to be taking steps towards helping himself.

he should definitely stop smoking pot all the time though, because that doesnt help in the long run.

ok, actually i read your entire post more carefully. so you're 15? i think you should be his friend and help him, but i think you need to get another bf. he has too many problems right now and you are too young to really deal with those problems. at your age you should not get so deeply involved with someone who is so messed up. you will wind up messing up your own life -  big time.

and also, what is he on probation for? and why cant he talk to anyone under 18?

I know you love this guy, but the way he’s treating you is completely unacceptable. Saying he’ll kill himself if you don’t stay with him is disgraceful, you can’t have a good relationship when one person emotionally blackmails the other like that, he’s manipulating you so you’ll do what he likes and you have to make it clear to him that he can’t do that. If you insist on staying with him (I agree with previous posters who said you shouldn’t though) you should tell him that even though you’ll be happy to be there for him and support him through his problems he can’t take out the way he feels on you like that.
P00ltoy’s right about stopping the marijuana, it tends not to affect people negatively you if you have no psychological issues but if you have a pre-existing condition (or if there’s a history of psychiatric disorders in the family i.e. your boyfriend’s father) smoking it can exacerbate the problem and can mean the medication the doctors given him won’t work as effectively. (On an unrelated note, if the first set of medication his doctor gives him isn’t effective get him to go back and get it changed to something else, some people give up if their first treatment doesn’t work but a lot of people I know including myself who’re on long term medication had to change at least once to find what works for them best).
Whatever you decide to do, remember that no matter how much you care about your boyfriend his actions are not your responsibility, if he chooses not to go to college or not to seek proper treatment (including being honest in therapy as it’s just as important as the pills) it’s not your fault and you shouldn’t beat yourself up about it. You seem like a smart, caring girl, it would be a pity if you let yourself get dragged down by this.

Sorry about the length there XD

Yeah, I told him that if the pills dont work, to go back and talk with his doctor, but he doesnt like his doctor, so he doesnt tell him shit. Hes on probation because about 3 years ago he got caught smoking weed, and got caught for shoplifting one time. And hes not able to talk to anybody under 18 because he got caught with a 15 year old drunk girl. He was actually trying to help her get inside the house, but she refused to, and they ended up getting caught. Which means he also got his license suspended until march. Well, hes able to drive until 6 PM. But thats for work and college. =/

Hes never going to stop smoking pot, or smoking ciggs. I wish he would. I hate it, its disgusting, it makes him act like a fucking idiot. But hes never going to stop. And told me straight to my face that if i ever left him for that, then i obviously wasn't "the one", because I left him for something he loves doing. Which just would make me feel like the bad guy. Listen, i love this guy more than anything. its just that with time, he just gets worse and worse. And I feel that the fact that he wants to die just kills me. It makes me so damn worried that he WILL die. And my world would be crushed. I just want him to be happy. But he refuses to be, and that hurts. Although he claims he'll do everything he can to help himself, which is also bullshit because one time he said that hes waiting to die, and the tought of death is more comforting than the thought of being in love. That really hurt when he said that. =[

But whatever, I just want him to get help. hes been on these pills for about 2 weeks, and it takes 6 weeks to reach the full effect, so we'll have to see if it even helps. If it doesnt, i hope he switches to something else.

oh, and I know why hes depressed. its because he hates life, people, and pretty much just everything. college and work is stressful to him. and he doesnt have too many friends.  so yes, i have talked to him about it, but it always makes me depressed because then he goes on about killing himself. =[

I didn't get the reaction I was hoping for, but ok

Alright, so ive been with my boyfriend for over a year now. I love him more than anything, but im starting to have an issue. See, he smokes pot all the time. Actually, he smokes so much that he forgets to call me at night time, or text me. Maybe im just being annoying, but he always says he'll do something but never goes through with it. He chooses pot over me even talking to me. Ill be so nice and ask him how his day is, and he'll get all b**chy and say that hes going to go smoke so he doesnt have time to talk to me. He has no f**king money because thats what he spends it on. Hes in college, but he doesn't even want to be in college for his profession anymore. He doesnt know what he wants to do with life. Hes extremely depressed and suicidal alot. Im with him because I love him for the amazing parts of his personality, but hes always telling me that hes going to die young. And that hurts me so much to hear that the guy I love is saying that he hopes hes going to get hit by a bus someday. Like why the f**k would you tell your girlfriend that? Hes on depression pills, so im hoping to god that they work. His birth father is crazy and in an asylum so my boyfriend always assumes that he'll end up crazy because of genetics. He doesn't even know for sure. He wont be honest with his psyciatrist because he doesnt trust him. He doesnt trust his doctor because one time when he was suicidal, his doctor put him in the hospital, so he hates his doctor now. Hes on probation and hes not even allowed to talk to anybody under 18. He is 18, im almost 16. I love him so much and im so worried for him, but its so stressful because hes such a pot head, hes completely depressed and he has no intrest in ANYTHING. He doesnt even smile or laugh anymore. =[ Im hoping this gets better. I treat him so well and try to be there for him, so I know im a good girlfriend. Am i doing a bad thing by staying positive and trying to help him? He says that if im not with him, he'll kill himself. And I dont want to leave him, I just want this to get fixed. Your thoughts? sorry that this was so long... its just a complicated story. What do you guys think?

-bluestar789

Have you ever considered smoking pot with him? I know this advice might sound weird but have you ever considered doing it just once so that you're both in the same mind frame. I know I'm not dr. phil or anything but i can clearly see that he's using pot to get away from his problems. He doesn't want to talk to you, not because he doesn't love you, because i bet he does. From what I'm gathering so far is that he doesn't want to talk about any of this to you, or anyone else around him. Probably because it makes him feel more secure about himself. I never trusted councilors myself because they always say there is nothing wrong with me. And all they do is offer me anti-depressants. Which in my opinion means they want me to get addicted so they can get more money out of me... It's not going to happen!.

So whether or not you consider smoking pot is up to you. But how about the next time you see him when he's not stoned, look at him, look right into his eyes for 5 minutes to show him that you care, if he tilts his head and starts to stare at the ground, just bring his eyes back to your eye level. If he walks away then let him, if you try and force him then you're just going to get into a fight.  

I refuse to smoke pot.

Oh boy. He almost broke up with me. But I think i talked him out of it.

I kinda freaked out because lately all hes been doing is smoking pot, and hes forgetting about me. He never texts me or calls me. And he acts as if he doesnt give a shit. So... i kinda freaked out and was like, wtf, why dont you ever call/text. why the hell does he always forget me? i text him and he like, doesnt respond because hes too high. Well I told him that ill change my act and that I wont be paranoid about it. He said that its a pointless argument and im scared to death that he'll leave me. So im "changing my act" and becoming what he wants me to be, which is not paranoid and chill. And i am chill with my friend, but i get so worried about him. Idk. I suck. =[